Saturday, August 30, 2014
Friday, August 29, 2014
As I pulled around the corner for the first afternoon pick up of my three small children after the first week of school had completed for the 2014 2015 school year, I couldn't help but have tears well up in my eyes as I contemplated the many many people who will go through this week without their children there close to them going through this experience of growing up as their parents dreamed of for their entire lives. You see when you've been touched by illness or tragedy there is nothing else that matters other than seeing tomorrow.
Understanding full well that all six of my children for the moment are very healthy aside from the normal cold flu and ear infection that may come up throughout the year everyone has gotten a clean bill of health for the future. I still can't help but think of all the parents who have lost children and can't have these moments in the carpool lane waiting for their kids to come out complaining fighting pulling out each other's hair whining exhausted from the first week of school.
So it's important as we go through this back to school season and we all post pictures of our children in their cute little outfits with apples and chalkboard signs marking the passage from one grade to the next, that we are sympathetic and remember those who have lost children and those who can't have children for whatever reason. I'm so sorry. I truly am. for that empty place that you may feel for that void that you fill with prayer and anticipation waiting for that next pregnancy test to show positive or the bedroom you walk into that is now empty. My heart aches for you in the carpool lane.
It is really easy to get caught up in the every day. But I refuse to do that and forget the loneliness of the last seven years of my life that I felt prior to meeting my wonderful husband. My daughter was diagnosed with Langerhans cell histiocytosis at the age of eight and was given a 12 month path to healing that included chemotherapy and steroids thankfully she just had to have a surgery and quarterly scans and is now miraculously doing fine. Then my son who was born premature and was very ill received the diagnosis that he had epilepsy and had a horrible grand mall seizures and I was a single parent I didn't know how I was going to get through that trial.
But with that said I wouldn't change a thing. That journey brought me to the gratefulness and the humility that I feel now for the husband and the family to which I been blessed. The sacrifices that we all make for our children are nothing short of a miracle. For those of you who pray for us and spite of your loss or the absence of children in your lives for whatever reason I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart. I am truly thankful for every moment every breath every laugh every whining moment of my children's lives.
I hope you are too.
Have a wonderful Labor Day Weekend!
Friday, August 22, 2014
Last night was meet the teacher at my children's elementary school. This year we have three in elementary and three in middle school. What happened is straight up the most amazing moment in back to school history. Ever. Stay tuned...
So here's how it all went down. We walked toward the school and even though I have had four other children go through the doors of that school before, it occurred to me that this will be the last meet the teacher of kindergarten for any of my kids. Ever. Snif...
I have been blessed to be a part of my four bonus kids' lives for over three years now and the bonds have sunk in. We have them all the time except a few weekends a month so it's been awesome to get to know my kids better this summer. They're amazing, and hilarious, and mischievous and insane, and it's just fun. Especially when, after Aiden was born they told me I couldn't have more children and now I am privileged to get to be bonus mom to FOUR more. That's six! I sometimes feel like the old woman in the shoe, but mostly it's just fun. Never a dull moment.
This has been an amazing journey for me, but for my littlest ones M & A it's just beginning. For A, it was a blessing for us that he was placed in a class with other kids he knew already through activities at church and he even knows his teacher! Yay! His reaction was awesome.
It says so much... "I don't want to take this picture. I didn't initiate this picture. Haven't you gotten enough pictures, mom? Why is everyone staring at me?"
But in the end it's "pure awesomeness..."
Here's the normal pic of li'l man so you know what is non-goofball face looks like.
Happy Back to School, Friends!
Thursday, August 21, 2014
This isn't just another back to school blog with lists of how to keep the homework center organized. That's another post for another time.
This fall our children are ages 14,14, 12, 7, 5 1/2, and 5. This year they will all be in school for the first time. I have spent the last 10 months caring for my children after a layoff that turned out to be an enormous blessing to our family. I can say I haven't regretted a thing. Have we struggled financially? Sure. But, I can say this: I have given my children the one thing that isn't on any school supply list anywhere - my time.
My kids live in a fast paced world. They love horses, video games, superheroes, princesses and transformers yet they all know one thing for certain. They are truly loved.
So this back to school season I can confess that I am sure I have failed my children horribly the last few months. I have been too tired, too worried about my job search, too anxious, too everything.... But I do know this: I have been HERE. And being HERE is what so many kids are missing. They know they are loved, provided for and despite my shortcomings we have had a summer to remember because I was here.
As a weepy kinder / second grade / 7th grade / 8th grade momma, I will cry on the first day of school. Yep... I will weep because they're growing too fast (where does the time go?) and I will weep because I am grieving the loss of companionship and buzz of activity and the roller coaster ride that has been this summer.
So amid the "Boquets of Freshly Sharpened Pencils" (Meg Ryan, You've Got Mail) and the backpacks and soccer gear which now line the halls, the only thing that is missing is me. And, I know I can look at the backpacks and say, "We're Good." Because they know I'm there with them in the memories that we shared this summer and will continue to make for years to come and for that I am truly and deeply blessed.
Wednesday, August 6, 2014
Last week we went to my parents house and had cousins camp. Everyone had a wonderful time here is a simple highlight of what happened. Each day was filled with activities and opportunities to give back. Toward the end of the week the eight kids all planned a special talent show. That was a highlight of the time there. One of my favorite memories from the week ends of my little boy Aiden (5) doing a lip-synch to the final countdown.
Check it out: http://youtu.be/X0xW4qVDoPc
Hope you enjoyed the laugh!